Friday, December 16, 2011

couldn't undirty my scanner enough, but here you have

Lauren Levin's new chapbook, Song

"if you could have/your lungs/you should"

* * *

my somatics counselor asked me to sit quietly with her in the small, yellow room above Civic Center. of all places for somatic work (the puddles of pee, the needles, the weeping, the Dollar Tree bright red now with Christmas wares and the neabry buy XXX theater). she asked me to consider all the things thta might be killing me. because she knows i tend to hyper-perceive the futurity in which i (we all are) surely dying. she suggested that we just gaze at each quietly, comfortably, and think about how we were dying. with intention, while breathing together.

"that is easy", i thought, "because being with someone always saves me from the jaggedy clutching, always coats it over".

wrong. being with her is something else. she pressences in a no blushit sort of way. and wears hot lavender boots.

so it was terribly hard to sit with her without begining to shake and cry. which, i realized, was the point. and what did she do? she started humming, holding a note, a few notes really. in the space between us. and then, i REALLY started crying, because it felt like such an uninhibited, exquisitely small, intimate thing to do. and i want to keep getting closer and closer to that kind of practice. i do have lungs, so do you.

on Twitter

, where this blog lives now. because it can be read and posted to through that app, one-handed, on my back, by a body of water, or in the cool olive green light above my mattress. This is articulation my spine had not dreamed of before.

My blog lived on Tumblr for a minute

because it is so much easier to access from my phone. fallinginrealtime.tumblr This is the feed. No, I don't like it. I can't add another virtual box. I'll make due with Twitter.

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